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What Would You Do As President?

ScuttleMonkey posted about 7 years ago | from the its-got-what-plants-crave dept.

United States 1455

With the elections continually in the news there is constant discourse on what each candidate has done or will do. However, rarely do people get the chance to say what they would do. Here is your chance, you have been elected President of the US (god help us all), what items go to the head of the class and how would you handle them?

Sorry! There are no comments related to the filter you selected.

well.. (5, Insightful)

gangien (151940) | about 7 years ago | (#22037856)

call up Ron Paul and ask him what he'd do, and probably do that :P. I imagine starting with getting all our military home, would be one of the first few things.

Re:well.. (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038092)

Execute all the Paul-tards.

Humanity needs fewer retards.

Then I'd be all hypocritcal and morally suspect like Ron Paul, and rape the economy by re-introducing the gold standard.

Re:well.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038416)

Execute all the Paul-tards. Humanity needs fewer retards. Then I'd be all hypocritcal and morally suspect like Ron Paul, and rape the economy by re-introducing the gold standard.
You should probably find out where that execution line starts. You wouldn't want to be a hypocrite.

Re:well.. (0)

UbuntuDupe (970646) | about 7 years ago | (#22038258)

"Okay ... okay ... got it. Sounds good. Wait, now, just so we're on the same page, remind me again what a 'wetback' is?"

j/k I actually head a Ron Paul Meetup group, despite my reservations about some of his positions and the haze regarding the old Ron Paul newsletter.

Re:well.. (4, Informative)

dave562 (969951) | about 7 years ago | (#22038530)

Don't buy into the smear. Even the President of the Austin, TX branch of the NAACP came out in support of Ron Paul and said that he has known him for 20 years and he knows that he isn't a racist.

Re:well.. (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038646)

The head of the NAACP in Texas...come on isn't that a little like being the Head of the Committee for Jewish Relations in Nazi Germany?

Godwin's Law

Re:well.. (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038284)

I agree, except that I'd do everything the Ron Paul said except for the crazy stuff that makes no sense.

Not trying be totally flamebait here, I agree with SOME of his ideas but his nutty NAFTA conspiracy theories and the whole dissolving the IRS idea, and of course cutting us off from the rest of the world are way out there.

The common sense things that he agrees with like having a balanced budget, and bringing our troops home I completely agree with. Oh ya and repealing the Patriot Act, I do have to give him points for being one of the few candidates who want to do that, but his motives I disagree with.

Resign (5, Funny)

CrazyJim1 (809850) | about 7 years ago | (#22037898)

And let someone who knows what they're doing operate.

Re:Resign (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038210)


Wait. This isn't Fark???

Re:Resign (1)

eln (21727) | about 7 years ago | (#22038570)

No no, the correct thing to do is to employ a shadow government that holds all the power, and then operate merely as a figurehead. That way, you get all the perks without any of the responsibility.

Top Three Things (4, Interesting)

Mr.Intel (165870) | about 7 years ago | (#22037940)

1) Straighten out the economy. Oil prices, housing slump, and the mess that is the Federal Banking Commission. 2) Scale back the size of the Federal Government and lower taxes accordingly. 3) Get a kick-ass foreign relations team into the embassies and capitals to repair our good name.

Re:Top Three Things (3, Funny)

192939495969798999 (58312) | about 7 years ago | (#22037972)

0) get in a time machine because you have to be at least 35 years old to be president.

Re:Top Three Things (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038030)

yeah, because the last guy who tried to work things out with the gas prices didn't put us in a complete tail spin.

i'm thankful that you have no chance of being president since you obviously know little about history.

Number One Thing (4, Funny)

spun (1352) | about 7 years ago | (#22038212)

Absolute number one thing, first day on the job: get a blowjob from a cuter intern than Monica, then post pics of it on MySpace. You know, just to get that out of the way.

Ya know I thought about it ... (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22037954)

And there's a quote from Office Space rattling around my head as to what I'd do. I'm going to take the high road and not post it but that's what coming to mind.

Re:Ya know I thought about it ... (1)

cashman73 (855518) | about 7 years ago | (#22038256)

And there's a quote from Office Space rattling around my head as to what I'd do. I'm going to take the high road and not post it but that's what coming to mind.

Sorry, but I think President Clinton already beat you to it,... :-P

Since you asked... (5, Funny)

Crash McBang (551190) | about 7 years ago | (#22037974)

... any time I was in doubt as to what to do, President McBang would post the question to Slashdot and use the top-moderated answer for guidance.

Oh, and I'd ask Cmdr Taco what he thought as well.

Elected on Fri, Assassinated on Sat, Buried on Sun (4, Funny)

PrescriptionWarning (932687) | about 7 years ago | (#22037994)

If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assassinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If I was president

An old man told me, instead of spending billions on the war,
we can use some of that money, in the ghetto.
I know some so poor, they use the spring as the shower,
when screaming "fight the power".
That's when the vulture devoured

If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assasinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If I was president...
If I was president...
If I was president

But the radio won't play this.
They call this rebel music.
How can you refuse it, children of moses?

If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assassinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If i was president

Tell the children the truth, the truth.
Christopher Columbus didn't discover America.
Tell them the truth.
The truth
YEAH! Tell them about Marcus Garvey.
The truth YEAH! The truth.
Tell them about Martin Luther King.
Tell them the truth.
The Truth.
Tell them about JFK

If I was President
If I was president,
I'd get elected on Friday, assassinated on Saturday,
and buried on Sunday.

If I was president...
If I was president

Re:Elected on Fri, Assassinated on Sat, Buried on (2, Informative)

PrescriptionWarning (932687) | about 7 years ago | (#22038068)

FYI Lyrics by Wyclef Jean, "If I Was President"

VETO! (4, Funny)

mooingyak (720677) | about 7 years ago | (#22038002)

Veto everything. With exceptions for bills that repeal earlier laws.

Re:VETO! (4, Insightful)

Hatta (162192) | about 7 years ago | (#22038390)

Agreed. Then I'd pardon everyone in jail for simple possession.

Re:VETO! (2, Insightful)

xstonedogx (814876) | about 7 years ago | (#22038536)

Also agreed. Then I'd severely cripple or remove unrepresentative 'rule-making' bodies under the authority of the executive.

Two main concerns (5, Insightful)

egarff (242535) | about 7 years ago | (#22038006)

First: Honestly, I would do my best to remove our military presence from Iraq (and yes, I know this would probably lead to civil war, but I think its going to happen anyway, just delayed while we're there). Second: I would see if I could get the ball rolling on government insurance (socialist medicine), our privatized insurance system has become the bane of the under and uninsured people in the country, particularly children in those 2 categories.

Re:Two main concerns (2, Informative)

nrich239 (790194) | about 7 years ago | (#22038632)

I'm with you on both points. I work in the "healthcare" (bunch of crap) industry. Our company makes a profit from developing software to help find ways to deny more claims to make more money for our clients. Even people that are properly insured get screwed over by most insurance companies.

legislate to hem in the power of the exec branch (2, Insightful)

stevetures (656643) | about 7 years ago | (#22038012)

First thing I would do would be to understand that most people are unhappy with the powers given to the president during these last eight years. I would immediately begin to ask congress for a new checks and balances constitutional amendment.

Re:legislate to hem in the power of the exec branc (1)

moderatorrater (1095745) | about 7 years ago | (#22038302)

The checks and balances are already there, they just need to be enforced.

It worked for Nixon! (1)

cthulu_mt (1124113) | about 7 years ago | (#22038020)

1. Record all my private discussions.
2. ???
3. Profit!

In all seriousness (5, Insightful)

earnest murderer (888716) | about 7 years ago | (#22038022)

Quit doing things that make other people want to knock our buildings down.

Understandably this will make a number of very large corporations unhappy. But knocking a couple zero's off a few dozen people's income doesn't bother me much.

There's lots of other things I'd do, but this is the big one we've been refusing to make eye contact with for about 70 years.

If the economy takes a dive, I'll maybe push for a large domestic project rather than invent a war. Maybe an interstate highway syste... aww damn... I'll come up with something good.


Read My Lips (1)

fenodyree (802102) | about 7 years ago | (#22038026)

No More Dupes!
And all editors proven incompetent shall be ground into a fine product: Torgo's Executive Powder

for one... (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038032)

overturn 2001-2008

Answer the magic question! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038036)

"What would Hitler do?"

Let's watch and find out!

Simple answer (5, Insightful)

SeanTobin (138474) | about 7 years ago | (#22038066)

In order:
  • Have Ron Paul be my VP
  • Get legislation introduced eliminating the DMCA, Patriot Act
  • Get legislation introduced mandating consumer copyright bill of rights and resetting copyright terms to the term when the work was created
  • Resign, enjoy my retirement, pension & SS protection
  • Watch as Ron Paul fixes the economy, foreign & domestic policy
I'd try to get the first four items done within the first 24 hours. I don't think I could handle being president any longer than that.

Re:Simple answer (1)

xtracto (837672) | about 7 years ago | (#22038218)

I'd try to get the first four items done within the first 24 hours

Just as Jack Bauer how many issues can happen around a president in those 24 hours... they might be more difficult than you think!

Re:Simple answer (1)

Harmonious Botch (921977) | about 7 years ago | (#22038356)

Dang!! That was almost exactly what I was going to post.

One addition: Before resigning I'd pardon everyone who is incarcerated on any type of non-violent between-consenting-adults sex or drugs charge.

If I was president (1)

D+iz+a+n+k+Meister (609493) | about 7 years ago | (#22038070)

I'd get elected on Friday.
Assassinated on Saturday.
Buried on Sunday.

Re:If I was president (1)

zyzzx0 (935520) | about 7 years ago | (#22038690)

I'd get elected on Friday. Assassinated on Saturday. Buried on Sunday.
You beat me to it.... nice.

Going back to capitalism. (0)

pwnies (1034518) | about 7 years ago | (#22038090)

As a capitalist myself, I disagree with a lot of the redistribution of wealth ideals we have going on. I'd probably abolish (or at least tone down) social security to start with.
Also, I'd commercialize a lot of the government functions. I'd attempt to start having the government MAKE money rather than take it via taxes. In sectors where the government was failing to make money, I'd attempt to privatize it. Take the US mail for instance - it used to be a government ran cooperation, but went under private ownership and saved a ton of money by working for profits. Many of the other government functions could also be reassigned in this manor.
I'd also abolish unions. There was a time and a place for them, but not today. The only thing they do is interrupt the flow of commerce. If you want a higher wage, don't cry to your union, go work somewhere else.
Obviously things such as country wide internet access would be beautiful, however I think the government would need to have more money to take on a task such as that.

Re:Going back to capitalism. (1)

kellyb9 (954229) | about 7 years ago | (#22038414)

Obviously things such as country wide internet access would be beautiful, however I think the government would need to have more money to take on a task such as that.
Who would control it? I can see the Slashdot title now "Governments wants to set up country-wide internet access". Tagged "WhatCouldPossiblyGoWrong"

Re:Going back to capitalism. (5, Informative)

sktea (692457) | about 7 years ago | (#22038662)

Take the US mail for instance - it used to be a government ran cooperation, but went under private ownership and saved a ton of money by working for profits.

Are you high?

The U.S. Postal Service is an "independent establishment of the executive branch of the Government of the United States," according to statute; it is wholly government-owned and, as such, is exempt from prosecution under the Sherman Act, according to the Supreme Court. I quote from this link: http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/scripts/getcase.pl?navby=CASE&court=US&vol=540&page=736 [findlaw.com]

"The Postal Service has different goals, obligations, and powers from private corporations. Its goals are not those of private enterprise. The most important difference is that it does not seek profits, but only to break even...."

PUH-leeze. Get the facts wrong, and you're MY meat.

'In God We Trust' (5, Insightful)

CyberBill (526285) | about 7 years ago | (#22038096)

I would remove "In God We Trust" as the national motto, as well as removing the "Under God" from the Pledge of Allegiance. After that, I'd put limits on advertising and marketing which are constantly being shoved in our faces. Then I'd make Network Neutrality a reality. I'd pull out troops out of Iraq. Gay marriage would be legalized at the federal level. Basically I'd pretty much change everything. :)

Hemp (4, Insightful)

dave562 (969951) | about 7 years ago | (#22038100)

I would legalize hemp for industrial uses and decriminalize marijuana. There are so many great industrial uses for hemp that it is absolutely stupid not to be using it. Marijuana is also far safer than alcohol. Other than that big one I'd probably try to come up with some sort of Peace Corp like serious public works project to take care of the infrastructure in this country. I'd also like to see a similar program setup overseas in countries that would have us. Instead of sending in troops with guns and tanks, we could send in Americans with seeds and tractors. Maybe I'm a bit too idealistic, but I have a hard time believing that we wouldn't be well received around the world if we spent as much on actually improving infrastructure and agriculture and water supplies as we spend on bombs and guns and bullets and other military expenses.

My top 5 priorities, off the top of my head (5, Insightful)

jorenko (238937) | about 7 years ago | (#22038112)

1. Kick off investigations of the crimes of the Bush administration.
2. Scale down our forgein military presence (not quite to the extent Paul wants to, but significantly).
3. Do everything in my power to get all of the unconstitutional legislation that has been passed in the last few years repealed (Patriot Act, MCA, etc).
4. Balance the budget. I would lay down absolute ultimatums that government programs justify their existence and their tax cost to the American people, and cut anything that's not convincing. Maybe I'd even call for a vote on what programs get to stay. We would have to leave taxes at close to current for a few years and pay off our debt, though, I'm afraid.
5. Not overstep the bounds of my office with signing statements, etc.

Private Federal Reserve (1, Funny)

Platupous (316849) | about 7 years ago | (#22038134)

The first thing I would do is eliminate the Private Federal Reserve and start a government owned and operated Central Bank. The idiocy that is our current system, does not support sustainability and virtually guarantees a boom bust cycle, a debt bound working middle class and a large percentage of people in poverty.

This is all because of the international Banking Cartel and this can all be fixed with a Government controlled central bank.

If I was president of the USA (1, Insightful)

xtracto (837672) | about 7 years ago | (#22038136)

I would remove all frontiers (incoming of course) between Mexico and Canada. All immigration would be legal and people from all the world would be able to work.

I would increase punishments for non native americans who commit crimes. If they commit a crime, everything they got in the USA will be confiscated, they will be added to a criminals database and they would be deported to their countries (I do not want to make taxpayers fund their prison terms).

I would also bring all of the USA troops back home, all and everyone of them. And I will spend a lot of research and development funding on investigating ways to defend USA soil.


Of course, given that I am not an american, I do not think my views are shared by most people here. but hey, not that it really matters what any of us think

What would I do? (4, Funny)

Sciros (986030) | about 7 years ago | (#22038160)


Re:What would I do? (4, Funny)

mathletics (1033070) | about 7 years ago | (#22038704)

Two interns at the same time?

If I was President... (4, Insightful)

kellyb9 (954229) | about 7 years ago | (#22038166)

I would wonder how I got a few million people to vote for me, despite the fact that I refused to be controlled by special interest groups.

Oh nevermind, I'd never get elected.

I'd touch Batman's junk liberally (1)

Malevolent Tester (1201209) | about 7 years ago | (#22038184)

See how he likes being on the receiving end. Bastard.

Two words (4, Funny)

ProppaT (557551) | about 7 years ago | (#22038204)

Your mom

Experts (4, Insightful)

UnderDark (869922) | about 7 years ago | (#22038224)

I would get the EXPERTS on topics (Economy, Warfare, Science...) to tell me what the best course of action is (multiple, independent experts for sample size (exact size from stats experts)) and then act along those lines.

What Would I Do? (1)

The Aethereal (1160051) | about 7 years ago | (#22038266)

What Would You Do As President?
Nothing, besides veto damn-near everything.

Two. (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038278)

Two chicks at the same time.

What would I do? (1)

kellyb9 (954229) | about 7 years ago | (#22038282)

Nothing essentially. Actually better yet, I'd surround myself with people who actually knew what they were doing - not friends - not political appointments, just people who actually had a fundemental understanding of the problems facing this country.

My top 10 (1, Interesting)

Pojut (1027544) | about 7 years ago | (#22038288)

In no particular order:

1. Legalize ALL drugs (this includes regulation and taxation. Want to end the illegal drug trade? This is the fastest way.)
2. Require all able-bodied citizens between ages 18 and 35 (male and female) to undergo military bootcamp. This is NOT a draft however; after going through bootcamp, you are not required to serve in the military.
3. Abolish the two-party system
4. Erase all censorship from all media...This includes: Internet, Television, print, video games, music, etc.
5. Build a border-spanning fence. Every 75 miles, have a reinforced entry way in which people are allowed through.
6. Require that any immigrants that enter the US to be able to speak English prior to being granted citizenship.
7. Allow high school students to pick all of their classes throughout their 4-year High School education.
8. Allow all fifty states to have their say in gun ownership laws (I personally am for personal gun ownership.)
9. Require application for parental certificates (the program would be known as "If you can't feed em, don't breed em". It would be based on the financial situation of the parents, as well as their mental well being and relationship status...i.e. do they constantly fight, or are they constantly in love, etc.)
10. Legalize (and actively regulate) vigalante justice. (if everyone knows they can get their ass kicked by their gun toting neighbor, they are more likely to behave themselves)

Re:My top 10 (2, Informative)

nlitement (1098451) | about 7 years ago | (#22038354)

8. Allow all fifty states to have their say in gun ownership laws.
That would be against the second amendment of the federal constitution.

Re:My top 10 (0, Troll)

Pojut (1027544) | about 7 years ago | (#22038436)

It would also stop all this bullshit that people spew about gun control. I'm tired of all that.

Besides, if Vigilante Justice is made legal, I assure you no state would be dumb enough to make guns illegal ;-)

Re:My top 10 (2, Insightful)

EricWright (16803) | about 7 years ago | (#22038450)

9. Require application for parental certificates (the program would be known as "If you can't feed em, don't breed em". It would be based on the financial situation of the parents, as well as their mental well being and relationship status...i.e. do they constantly fight, or are they constantly in love, etc.)
Because all pregnancies are planned, right? Or are you talking about forced abortions?

Re:My top 10 (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038656)

It must be nice to be 16

bio-fuels and nuke plants (2, Interesting)

fifedrum (611338) | about 7 years ago | (#22038298)

3 year plan to institute a nation-wide algae based bio fuel farming and processing industry modeled after the rural farming unions and co-ops that drive our dairy industry. That is, anyone with the open land could create an algae farm with free seed algae from the gubermint, and cheap loans to build the infrastructure. Every so many days a truck from your local co-op fuel depot would pull up, siphon off your fuel and bring it to the distribution center, where the locals could then buy the fuel for their cars/trucks. Figure 250,000 fuel growing tanks, 1 acre each providing all the fuel the nation needs.

3 year plan to create thousands of small community owned pebble bed reactors situated in every army, marine, national guard and air-force armory in the nation. The reactors are small, the armories are (should be anyway) well guarded, so they do double-duty as power stations.

write huge incentive cheques to small inventors for producing commercially viable diesel electric hybrid cars running on the above two fuel sources.

Once those are in place, remove the IRS and current tax law, replace with a 3% flat tax. The huge increase in GDP caused by the above two will more than offset the taxes lost through the current corrupt system.

Jail many lawyers, politicians. Use them to feed the algae from #1 above.

Oh, what fun (1, Insightful)

gorbachev (512743) | about 7 years ago | (#22038306)

1. Befriend a whole bunch of rich folks
2. Do the whole "small Government" thing
3. Move out of the country and resign (in that order, to make sure I'd be able to escape)
4. Watch and laugh as the whole country (well, not quite the whole country, just the poor and middle class people) slowly plummets into chaos
5. Call a few of those rick folks I made friends with
6. Profit!!

Healthcare (1)

Bryansix (761547) | about 7 years ago | (#22038310)

To promote better healthcare I would start a new insurance company run either by the government or by a non-profit organization under charter from the government. This insurance agency would provide Health Insurance AT COST to anybody in all 50 states who wanted to pay for it. This would force real competition within the health insurance industry.

Honest answer. (3, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038336)

Put SCIENCE back in the classroom.

Tax religions like any other business.

Put people before corporations. (I love Capitalism but we've denigrated to Corporatism)

Move the US to metric. :)

Languages for Everyone (1)

spike_gran (219938) | about 7 years ago | (#22038346)

As president, I'd require every state to teach a second language through all of school and at state-funded universities. That language would be the same for every person in each state. The second language would be something that would unite the people of the state, give a local identity, and help global interaction.

First, we would try to be good neighbors. California, Arizona, New Mexico, and Texas would teach Spanish, because of the proximity to Mexico. Maine, New York, and Pennsylvania would teach French because of Quebec, and Louisiana would teach French because of history.

Then, we would try to keep some of our native heritage. Hawaii would teach Hawaiian. North and South Dakota would teach Dakota. Oklahoma would teach, say, Cherokee. Alaska would teach some Inuit language.

Some state would pick up American Sign Language. And then the rest of the states would choose some language off the top 20 [wikipedia.org] .

Well this would end badly... (1)

Rakishi (759894) | about 7 years ago | (#22038358)

The president is not god or a dictator or an emperor. He has power but much of his power it seems comes from connections, friends and the job holder's well trained skills at politics. I have no desire to gain such skills (that'd require me to cut out any remaining ethics and morals) and I have no illusions I am even capable of gaining them (much less doing so while in the fire). Hell I suck at dealing with people especially when I'm on the spot so it'd be worse than even for the average person.

More than likely I'd start abusing any power I actually had, due to my lack of having such powers, so things would go downhill even faster. The end result would be that my subordinates would try to bypass me, my advisers would try to hoard power and lei to me, no one would do what I wanted to them (beyond direct orders) and congress would hate me. I'd of course hate the job as well so I'd have almost no desire to dedicate myself to it especially since I'd likely see it as pointless.

I guess my only hope for salvaging something from such a debacle is that I'd have some nice looking interns. Actually that brings up the whole abusing power things so, yeah, things would go badly.

I would (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038360)

End male circumcision.

Cornholio! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038386)

Make the streets flow with the blood of the non-believers!

List in order (2, Informative)

nondisclosure007 (1046828) | about 7 years ago | (#22038398)

1. fund the creation of MagLev wind turbines (google it) and solar cells based on what Konerka (again, google it) is doing in that arena.
2. There has got to be a better battery technology than what is in use today. If we could get the wind and solar to the point of creating 250% of what we use, then we can store the extra for night-time use (and when the wind isn't blowing). Under current wind and solar technology this is just technically impossible. Thus see number 1.
3. Once you have the battery question solved (along w/ the wind and solar in place); switch all non-heavy-duty vehicles over to electric w/ the new battery and smaller versions of the MagLev turbine. So they charge when they're being driven.

enough about energy.

4. abolish the Federal Reserve. It was setup illegally; it's a private bank. Did you know, for every dollar that the Federal Reserve prints, it charges the US gov't $1 + interest? over 90% of the US govt debt is owed to this private bank. And why? Because the US doesn't regulate it's own currency. Countries in the world w/ no debt, like say Russia, print and maintain their own currency. I'm just saying.
5. Then w/ all that in place; bring home every last soldier. They don't need to be anywhere but here, guarding OUR borders, not someone else's.

Screw the IRS! They're just the "heavy" for the private bank. 'No taxation w/out representation' my @$$.

Couldn't do it. (1)

FrankSchwab (675585) | about 7 years ago | (#22038408)

I don't have the skills to be president. Now, if you changed the question to "What would you do as King?", well, then we could talk.

I will serve with all my heart... (1)

Ared (1219670) | about 7 years ago | (#22038428)

being president is the hardest job you can have, it takes lots of responsibility but it also a job which give you more happiness if you serve honestly and humility because of the many people you can help and serve as well...

Tsiangkun 2012 (3, Interesting)

Tsiangkun (746511) | about 7 years ago | (#22038430)

1) I will repeal corporate personhood.

2) I will tax the top 5% and distribute the wealth through increased funding for basic academic research, reimburse college loans for students carrying 3.2GPA or higher, national daycare programs, and national health care programs.

3) Prosecute the supreme court justices who appointed Bush, and every person in the federal governemnt who continued to aid and abet the terrorist regime.

4) Establish a department of peace, reduce military funding, and give anyone a seat a a negotiating table so we do not have to fight them "over there" or "over here".

5) Reparations for the victims of hurrican katrina who were failed by their governments.

Top 3 (1)

stinerman (812158) | about 7 years ago | (#22038470)

First, I'd work with congress on ending the practice of gerrymandering and on ending discriminatory ballot access laws, which I think are the biggest threat the republic.
Second, I'd withdraw from the Berne Convention and ask congress to pass sane copyright laws.
Third, I'd remove all our troops from the following countries:

Kenya, Egypt, Japan, Indonesia, Singapore, Thailand, Australia, all European countries, Qatar, Bahrain, Kuwait, UAE, Cuba, Columbia, and Iraq.

Steal the Heart of Gold? (1)

bpfinn (557273) | about 7 years ago | (#22038480)

I'd look for Magrathea.

If I Were President... (1)

kilo_foxtrot84 (1016017) | about 7 years ago | (#22038482)

...I'd plan on having a four-year term.

How much time in every first-term presidency is spent trying to get a second term? How much time is wasted on the campaign trail that could be put to use in other, more constructive manners?

As for my actual agenda... while keeping in mind that politics is a two level game and international concerns must continue to receive support, I would do my best to support domestic initiatives, particularly education. I'd also make darn sure I had some good advisors, because I know I don't have all the answers.

The World is my Country (1)

zyzzx0 (935520) | about 7 years ago | (#22038484)

1) I would implement an ad campaign entitled "The World is my Country, it's people my Countrymen," pushing my press secretary to repeat it every day.
2) I would create a department of peace.
3) I would truly invest in alternative energy by pushing congress to spend $40Billion on a new energy infrastructure, giving grants to businesses who create wind and solar farms, and businesses who are near the completion of high capacity batteries and capacitors.
4) I would cut back on military spending, investing in education, research, the department of peace and alternative energy progress.

I'll tell you... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038506)

First: Two chicks @ the same time... and if I were elected president, I think I could hook that up.

Second: Nuke the middle east. All of it. even our friends

Third: Attempt to legalize every illegal drug. Declare the war on drugs over.

Fourth: End the Patriot Act, DMCA, etc.

Fifth: Disband the DHS & IRS.

Sixth: Declare Martial Law and let the hilarity ensue.

Be Boring (1)

wsherman (154283) | about 7 years ago | (#22038510)

A good government is a boring government. A good government gets the basics rights and makes decisions on the basis of impartial analysis of factual observation (not gut feelings and radical ideology).

The basics:

  • Don't violate human rights or civil rights.
  • Abide by the basic tenets of international law.
  • Balance the budget (and pay down the debt).

The details:

  • Use technology to enable (informed) input from general population to establish (and maintain) collective goals.
  • Enact policies to achieve the collective goals based of impartial analysis of factual observations.
  • If sufficient factual observations are not available then implement policies on an experimental basis in order collect sufficient information to decide on more permanent policies.

The bottom line is that, if I was president, it wouldn't be about what I wanted - it would be about what the people wanted. It wouldn't be about what I (and my "gut") thought would work to achieve - it would be about what an impartial analysis of factual observations thought would work.

This is easy... (1)

slashname3 (739398) | about 7 years ago | (#22038516)

Initiate a 15 year plan to move the U.S. from a gasoline based transportation infrastructure to a hydrogen fuel cell based infrastructure. This would require building a number of nuclear plants to generate the hydrogen as well as supply the power for new factories to support the new infrastructure. Oil companies would be mandated to assist with the conversion as well as automobile manufacturers to create vehicles in all classes trucks, buses, SUV, sedans, etc that run on fuel cells.

This would generate jobs as well as get the economy moving again.

I would also start the process of pulling all U.S. troops from overseas assignments. The only way U.S. troops would remain overseas is if the host country paid us for the protection. The extraction of troops from Iraq would be prefaced on getting the Iraqi military up to speed to handle their own internal issues.

There would be a brief foray into Pakistan to finally capture/confirm dead Bin Laden. After that they would be on their own.

A set of security measures would be implemented to protect against ballistic missiles as well as scanning all cargo vessels interring out waters for nuclear or biological weapons.

A very simple tax plan would be implemented, 10% no deductions. This would put more money in the hands of the people that earned it which would stimulate the economy.

Heart of Gold (1)

laejoh (648921) | about 7 years ago | (#22038518)

Well, steal a starship ofcourse!


Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038534)

Jesus Christ, Slashdot has really jumped the shark with the introduction of the politics section.

  It's more like a fifth grade civics class than ever before with this lame ask slashdot question.

The usual stuff (1)

Joe U (443617) | about 7 years ago | (#22038540)

Crush the lesser races, conquer the world, unimaginable power, unlimited rice pudding, et cetera, et cetera.

That's easy (5, Funny)

0xdeadbeef (28836) | about 7 years ago | (#22038542)

Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others!

Might as well... (3, Interesting)

kallisti777 (46059) | about 7 years ago | (#22038576)

Consider this a platform, since I'll be 35 fairly soon.

1. Use our armed forces for national defense, not the world's police
2. Divert savings from needless wars into balancing the budget and paying down the debt
3. Reverse laws that punish victimless crimes and legislate personal morality
4. Pardon and release non-violent drug offenders to help with prison overcrowding
5. Revise the tax code to bring fairness and relief to the working/middle classes

Since it doesn't look like Dr. Paul will get the nomination, vote me in 2016... if we're still here.

Power to People! (1)

sciop101 (583286) | about 7 years ago | (#22038582)

1. Abolish Department of Homeland Security.

2. Abolish Transportation Security Agency.

3. Deport illegal aliens.

4. Enforce border.

5. Develop trustworthy voting.

Encourage voting & public involvement in civic affairs.

Grand scale and vision (3, Interesting)

Liquidrage (640463) | about 7 years ago | (#22038588)

Every election is the same thing. Candidates with speech writers talk the talk of "at home" issues. They can almost never do anything about it because "at home" issues are mostly local issues. Outside of coming up with a way to tax more more, and going to war, Washington doesn't do much for me. When the fed cuts rates or raises them, that impacts me at home. Most of the at home issues they don't belong in anyways.

But what ever happened to thinking big. Last time we thought big was the 60's I guess and the space race. We're a large country, I want a large project. One that inspires us (try putting a price on inspiration), and that becomes a legacy for an entire generation. One whose impact will last for decades.

I would love to see some grand project. Lunar colony (not in 20 years, but like, let's start doing it now). New space vehicle. Particle accelerator bigger then anything on the drawing board today. Something. Anything that inspires us and improves the planet.

My List (1)

MyLongNickName (822545) | about 7 years ago | (#22038596)

1) Create a balanced budget over next four years.
2) Insist China float its currency, or stop trade.
3) Withdrawal of troops over four years. The immediate pullout is insane, even through we truly have no business being in Iraq in the first place.
4) National Health Insurance. Having companies in charge of your benefits makes no sense.
5) Seriously fund head start.

I know! (4, Interesting)

jollyreaper (513215) | about 7 years ago | (#22038600)

That smokin' hot deaf chick on West Wing.

Oh, I thought you asked "who."

Let's see, what would I do as president? I think the speech would go a little something like this.

"Hey, folks, you know how they say there's nothing that gets an economy moving like a war? Let's consider that for a moment. We're talking about uniting the entire nation behind one goal. We're talking about reordering the economy to meet this goal, every working man and woman either directly engaging in the mission or serving in a supporting role. We train the flower of our youth, equip them with our treasure and send them thousands and thousands of miles away to foreign lands, all this effort just to drop a bomb in someone's lap. Could you imagine going to this sort of effort to give that same guy a helping hand, rebuild a house, provide a hot meal or maybe just a cold beer? It's laughable! And what a sad joke we are as a species that we feel this way.

"So, what's on the agenda for the next four years? We're going to go to war. Not any of this silly war on drugs and terror nonsense, much more effective than the war on poverty. No, we're going to war on business as usual, the way we've always been doing things. We spend $500 billion on the military and what we have to show for it is worth maybe a tenth of that number. Our nation has lost its leading role in science and industry. The solution to these problems is not just throwing money at 'em, the solution is to use that money intelligently.

"It's a simple truth that centralized organizations are among the most efficient forms of human effort we've ever seen. The Soviet Union's economy fell apart because bureaucrats in Moscow tried to make decisions on how business on the other side of the empire should be conducted. The former genius of the capitalist system was the decentralization of authority to the periphery of the economy, let the businesses make decisions on what they need to produce and how to do it. Efficient organizations succeed, inefficient ones are allowed to fail, their capital and employees and resources free to be used by more efficient enterprises. Folks, the consolidation we're seeing with today's megacorporations is simply a repeat of the Soviet folly. And the growing wasteful bureaucracy in Washington is no better.

"Government needs to concentrate on what government does best in a 21st century nation-state. Such duties include providing for the common defense, making treaties with foreign powers, providing regulation and inspection of private enterprise to ensure those organizations operate in the public interest, national health care and retirement funds, and conducting basic research in the sciences.

"Government is not to be a piggy bank for special interests to raid. It is not a cash cow to be tapped by connected contractors who have made big donations to politicians. To that end, all political campaigns will be publicly funded. Anyone money recieved from outside the election funding system will be seen as a bribe and the criminal penalties will follow from that."

That's just a few thoughts I had off the cuff. I would assume if I ever were president and tried to say something like that, I'd be taken aside into a smoke-filled room and shown that film of the Kennedy assassination, but shot from a view I've never seen before, a view that looks like it's from the Grassy Knoll. "Any questions?"*

*With apologies to Bill Hicks.

immigration first, then taxes (1)

alta (1263) | about 7 years ago | (#22038606)

I think a fence is unrealistic. I think the way to do it is stiff sanctions on companies hiring illegals. And check, check often and check more often. If illegals are found, fine the company and arrest the illegals. Send them packing. When the companies are no longer offering them jobs, then they'll stop coming.

And to further that, I'd nix this universal healthcare crap. Do they realize that it is going to compound the immigration problem immensely! Sounds good to be nice to everyone, but it's about as practical as that damn fence. Not to mention, I'm not working my ass off so someone who doesn't work can go to the emergency room to get a painkiller every time they have a hangnail.

Then I'd get rid of the thing that says if you have a baby here, you get to stay.

Once we stop the flow, then we work on sending back that ones that aren't here legally. THEN if we still have a problem, I'd think about a fence.
Internationally I'd be pushing to get out of Iraq soon, but that means, 'get 'er done' as soon as possible, not 'Get out at all costs'

I know this isn't going to make me popular around here, but it's my honest answer to the question.

Here goes... (2, Informative)

jpatters (883) | about 7 years ago | (#22038610)

My first act after being sworn in would be to bring all US troops home from Iraq.

My second act would be to issue a presidential pardon for all non-violent drug offenders.

My legislative priorities, assuming like-minded people have been also been elected to the House and Senate, would be:
1) The end of the War on Some Drugs. The money currently spent on that would go toward drug treatment, see item 3 below.
2) Repeal of the DMCA, and systematic reform of the copyright, trademark and patent laws. Copyright would be an initial term of five years, renewable for one additional term of five years, with an open format preservation requirement for the renewal. The scope of what is protected by trademark law would be substantially narrowed. Software patents would be kaput.
3) A single payer comprehensive national health care plan. Neither employers, nor university presidents would be permitted access to people's medical records.
4) The current tax code would be scrapped, and replaced by a simple progressive income tax with no loopholes. I am also open to using a national sales tax with a progressive, income sensitive prebate program.
5) Immigrants who want to come to the US for a better life would be welcome, without quotas or limits, even if they have darker skin than me or speak a different language.
6) New education standards, with a heavy emphasis on math and science. Schools receiving federal funds would be prohibited from having ID as part of the science curriculum, and would be required to have as much resources put into arts, music and such as are put into sports.

I have some detailed plans for my run.... (2, Interesting)

crhylove (205956) | about 7 years ago | (#22038624)

...when I'm eligible in 2012:

1. Have a camera and public feed of me at all times, as a true servant of the people.
2. Remove all surveillance cameras and traffic cameras.
3. Fiber to every home and free national internet.
4. No more war unless we are directly under attack.
5. Solar Power.
6. Break up the corporate monopolies.
7. Free the radio and television spectrums for public use.
8. Give the public the truth about JFK and Roswell and 9/11 (I'm not saying I know what it is, but as president, I would, right?).
9. Completely restore the constitution.
10. Go back to the Gold standard.
11. Eliminate the current credit card system.
12. National Health Care
13. Make copyright last no longer than 5 years, for any design or art.
14. Fix our defunct education system (something along the lines of OLPC/wikipedia).
15. Invest more in NASA.
16. Move from airplanes to a slower, cheaper, safer, more environmentally friendly zeppelin system.
17. Expand the peace corp.
18. Give every American a free cellular video phone.
19. Lock up all the criminals currently in power.
20. Repair our international relations with every country not actively involved in a genocide.
21. Give incentives for electric vehicles, like the Tesla Motor Car.

I have a few other goals, and I think they are actually realistic. Some will be harder than others, obviously. A lot of money will be saved over the current system as we are eliminating much of the corporate profiteering (health insurance, cellular companies, internet providers, cable companies), and by implementing a superior video phone infrastructure, there will be less need to travel or commute. Plus, once the solar infrastructure is all in place, it will be much cheaper to maintain than our current oil based infrastructure. After all the ground work is done I'd like to focus on safer and healthier food, quality of life, and mental health issues, as well as an improved food pyramid that reflects more of the true benefits of eating higher quantities of hormone free meat, and chemical free vegetables and fruit. There is plenty of evidence showing that the current food pyramid is dead wrong.

I'd also like it if as an aptitude test for graduating high school, kids could build a simple radio, fix a car, perform CPR, write a basic software application, and read music on at least one instrument. I also think reading, writing, and arithmetic are important, but we should be farther along by now.

Another area of research we should invest more in is automated vehicles. The traffic and mortality rates here in southern California are pretty atrocious. My carbon-fiber solar powered zeppelin designs could go a long way to assisting in this endeavor as well.

Make sure laws are enforced (1)

techpawn (969834) | about 7 years ago | (#22038680)

President is head of the EXECUTIVE branch. Aside from appoint people to positions and try to influence legislation they do nothing more than sign paperwork, ensure that laws are being enforced and try to keep us out of military trouble.

People make all these broad claims about what they'll do as president. What about "surround myself with people who know what to do in the role in which they are placed and make sure my pencil is sharp"? The Congress makes laws, the courts make sure they don't go against the law of the land. All I would be doing is make sure things are running smoothly.

Much like a Senor SysAdmin?

Heres what I would do (1)

Doug52392 (1094585) | about 7 years ago | (#22038684)

1. Eliminate the RIAA

2. Create a new governmental agency called the Federal Lawsuit Agency, whose job would be to go through all the pending lawsuits, and make sure stupid and pointless ones don't get to court.

3. Actually _listen_ to what Americans wants

4. Eliminate the Federal Income Tax

5. Limit the power of capitalist companies with way too much power (eg. Microsoft, Comcast).

6. End the war in Iraq

7. Write network neutrality into the United States Constitution.

8. Ban warrantless wiretapping, and make providing wiretaps a $1 million per person fine towards ISPs.

9. Lower health care costs, insurance costs, and other costs for the less wealthy people.

10. If in the event a major event were to occur during my term in office, I would _not_ overreact and go to war

11. Make it a federal crime, punishable with a minimum of a $1 million dollar fine and 1 year in federal prison, for any public organization, company, school, collage, or anyone to deny and/or punish innocent people for expressing their Constitutional rights, or doing nothing at all.

very disapointing answers (1)

RevDigger (4288) | about 7 years ago | (#22038696)

Just, "wow". Note to (almost) everyone who answered: America is losing two wars right now, and spending $200B for the privilege. I'm seeing maglevs and french language classes and...wow. All sorts of Star Trek engineering solutions, and (almost) no one mentions the loosing two wars thing. My expectation for the next election just dropped even lower.

interns (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038698)

1) Hire young female interns

2) Buy box of cigars

3) You know the rest...

- Bill Clinton

The question shouldn't be what, but who

In phases (1)

wonkavader (605434) | about 7 years ago | (#22038708)

Phase One
    Real campaign finance reform
    Clean up children's television requirements/advertising to children
    Mandate debates of candidates
    Revoke broadcast rights of violators, pending hearing, making not following the law so frightening that broadcasters will follow with a big smile.
    Investigate last administration
    Pour money into the NSF, alternative fuels
    Mandate military to fund research on manufacturing processes for everything they buy
    Cleaner air for cities (increase coal restrictions) to lower asthma/health costs.
    Socialized medicine.
    Increase Social security payments -- 2% for all income above current cap.

Phase Two
    Push prosecution of executive officers for wrongdoing by corporations
    Veto any law longer than 15 pages -- budget the only exception. "Just send me as many short laws as necessary."
    Establish a pork fund to eliminate waste of pork projects -- just send them the money.
    Eliminate all corn ethanol subsidies. Send large subsidies to independent farmers -- loss of ethanol revenue should not lower the yearly income of the independent farmer. No more money to ADM/Conagra.

Phrase Three
    Eliminate executive orders. Rescind and publish all previous ones.
    More stringently define "State of War" to include congressional declaration thereof.
    Push for constitutional amendment to make treaties less powerful than the constitution.
    Set up truth and reconciliation commission on torture. Prosecute all who do not confess and attempt reconciliation.
    Increase penalties for bribery to life imprisonment.
    Set up branch of IRS to audit all elected officials every year.

Phase Four
    Clean up electoral college. No declaration of candidates by college members until after election. No term limits for electors.

FIx health care and stop CEO's form makeing big... (1)

Joe The Dragon (967727) | about 7 years ago | (#22038720)

Fix health care and stop CEO's form makeing big money for job cuts and pay cuts.

Dump the out outsourced EDS systems in the navy and marines.

Fix the chicago area roads and other areas that need it.

Push for high speed rail in the us.

Dump the DMCA

give president pardons to our soldier in jail for doing there job in iraq.

Have bush put on trail for the laws that he broke starting with his fixing of the vote.

Overhaul the electoral system (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038724)

If I were president, I would overhaul the electoral system so that it was more fair. There has been plenty of research showing that plurality voting is the least fair method, http://science.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/01/06/0649217 [slashdot.org] . The root problem of all of the USA's woes is an ineffective, corrupt government and without addressing the system by which the representatives are elected, there will be no lasting change. Once the electoral system allows moderates to take part in US government again, other problems will be solvable rather than "trench warfare".

Annex Mexico (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038750)

Mexico has OIL, we can keep all of our tourist dollars, and the illegal immigration problem ceases immediately - stay where you are, we'll bring the U.S. to you!

Me? (1)

MBGMorden (803437) | about 7 years ago | (#22038760)

- End any form of government mandated censorship.
  - Codify network neutrality into law.
  - Legalize prostitution and most narcotics with some extra taxes imposed on both.
  - Limited copyright to a 10 year non-renewable term.
  - Mandate use of OSS and open document formats in all Government agencies.
  - Lower drinking age to 18.
  - Nationally increase age of consent to 18.
  - Build a number of state-owned hospitals that would provide medical care to all citizens for no charge (beyond the tax increases needed to pay for this)
  - Seriously review criteria for bringing civil suits to eliminate frivolous lawsuits
  - Codify the right of all citizens to own and carry small arms (anything firing a standard projectile that's not fully automatic. Fully automatics to be regulated by means of the Federal stamp as they are currently, but without the 1984 manufacture date cutoff).
  - Outlaw abortion (sorry, I know it's not popular around here, but that's one of my beliefs, and it's not religiously motivated).
  - Enact Federal laws to remove ID teaching from public schools.
  - Scale back military operations around the world. Reduce overall military budget by 15%. 1/3 of the recouped budget would be diverted to NASA. 1/3 to fund the aforementioned health plan coverage, and the other 1/3 to be directed towards funding independent scientific research.
  - Marriage replaced with legal entity civil partnership which is identical and open to any couple regardless of orientation. Marriage ceremonies are made legally unofficial and can be handled as each individual and their clergy sees fit.

  - Given that the President cannot do all of these things, I will rename my position "Supreme High Ruler". :D

That's my idea of perfection. The sad truth is though that there is no perfect solution or perfect ruler, because many people want different things for this country. There are some issues that flat out are going to conflict between people. While we could all make "The world as it should be." (TM) if we were ruler of the world, we have to accept the fact that it would only be perfect from our own vantage point, and would still be just as flawed as it is now to many others.

Let's see... (1)

MozeeToby (1163751) | about 7 years ago | (#22038766)

First, I would order the military leaders to devise an exit strategy for Iraq that would minimize military and civilian strategies. I don't know how to do it, they do so I'd leave the micromanaging up to them.

I would also defund the great wall of Mexico and use that money along with a portion of the Iraq war money to improve our nations name over seas by offering a system of grants, assistance, and loans to developing nations and nations that have a stron anti-american sentiment. If the offer is refused it will be renewed every 6 months.

At home, I would boost spending to education and sciences, especially "pure science" projects such as high energy physics. Legalize marijauna and tax the hell out of it, use this money and other vice taxes to implement a national insurance plan.

Of course in order for that to happen I'd have to thrown the insurance lobby out of Washington so while we're at it we'll just get rid of all the lobbies at once.

Finally, I would raise taxes for oil companies and on gasoline itself and use those revenues to do real developement on wind/solar/nuclear projects.

Of course, that isn't so much an "If if were president" as it is an "If I were dictator". The chances of any of this happening are slim to none, even if the president wants it and works for it. Many things are decided by congress and congress is heavily influenced by the lobbies. If I had to choose between getting Republicans out of the white house or getting rid of lobbiests; well, how much more damage can the republicans really do?

The first thing I do (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 7 years ago | (#22038784)

Kill all the lawyers.
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